Skip to main content

Finding peace of mind on a bike

           Christmas away from my children
                        school shootings                Sean                    bills      
                                      laundry           war              schedule                  lesson plans                                                         not running        package to mail         presents to purchase        hurtful words
                  poor choices                                  Afghanistan

"SHUT UP!"
I yell to all the thoughts swirling in my head.
They do not quiet.
They are always there.
Ideas for new lessons in hopes of engaging students,
What life is like for Sean half a world away,
When will I hear from him again?
Oh no! I need to remember to mail his package.
What must it be like for those 27 families in CT as they prepare for Christmas?
Do I have all the presents I need to get?
What will Christmas be like without the girls?
Laundry, dishes, vacuuming
I drive on in search of some peace of mind.

I follow his bike to get to the one I will ride.
Six months since I last rode - a 250 in class
Never riding the road on anything more than a scooter.
Pulling into the driveway, a Honda Shadow greets me.
Trepidation and excitement fills me.
Will I remember everything I learned?
He starts up the bike.
The roar of the pipes drowns out everything on my mind.
The drills begin -
First the driveway clutch exercises,
down to the stop sign to practice a slow turn,
around the block for shifting, stopping, and starting,
Each step of the way, my teacher guiding me.
 
And then, a longer ride
on a bigger road
the wind in my face
blowing away all my worries
back much too soon
plans to do it again the next day.
 
Driving home
feeling like I could take on the world
 knowing I needed to make the bike mine.
For the freedom and peace of mind riding brings
is better than any drug a doctor can prescribe.









Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Hardest One Yet

 From the time I began this blog, I made the conscious choice that I would be honest and open in the moment – whatever is going on. For the most part, I have done that.  After struggling about whether to write about this particular challenge (let alone share it), I chose to do the uncomfortable and do both – write and share. “Your certification has not even been processed yet. Probably won’t happen until at least the middle of January.”  I took a deep breath as I heard those words a couple weeks ago and I realized what that meant. Christmas would look very different than originally planned. The retroactive pay that Santa was counting on to make the holiday something special for our family would not be coming. I took a deep breath as I hung up the phone and walked out of my classroom, despair bombarding the hope and excitement of the upcoming holiday. A tornado of thoughts began whirling in my head as I walked to the guidance office. Playing with our budget in my head trying to

The Next Chapter Begins...

The first round of tears happened during the 8 th grade promotion. It has been such a wonderful year with all of them – 7 th and 8 th graders alike. The second round of tears came when I learned I do not have a contract for next year. I will not be returning to Benson Middle School unless the displaced teachers do not jump at the chance for my classroom.   Right after she told me, I did my best to remain professional and keep the tears at bay. Unfortunately, they came anyway. About the time the tears hit my eyes, an email a dear friend sent me when I first wrote about the contract situation came to mind: “There is always a reason for things. Maybe God wants you to move on and inspire other students.” I love what she says. I feel that with my whole being. However, it did not make hearing that I have no job any easier. So now what? I am floating off the edge again. My family began the year in two different states. We are reunited again in North Carolina. Both Tony and I with

Aging sucks.....or does it?

Upon first thought, watching a parent age sucks. Unnoticeable at first. A bit of a stoop, some creaking in the knees, whitening of the hair. The doctor’s visits begin, as do the pills One for high blood pressure, another to thin the blood, and a handful of vitamins to top it off. The signs are there, but it is easier to see him as he has always been. My father, a pillar of strength. Until my pillar was knocked off-kilter. A simple surgery and the mortality of my father looked me square in the eye when the drugs took hold of his brain. Amidst his fidgeting and confusion, I realized…AGING SUCKS! And then….enlightenment dawned upon me….AGING IS BEAUTIFUL Wrinkles tell of smiles while silver hair speaks a life of memories. Knees creaky after years of kneeling in prayer, offering up a lap, and climbing up the stairs for one more kiss goodnight. Almost forty-eight years of memories nestled in my heart. Memories of my father. Taking us to church each Sunday Building and fixing