Jumpin' Off the Edge

I'm sorry. Two little words that mean so much and can be so hard to say.  I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me. I'm sorry I left our family. I'm sorry my actions hurt you. Oftentimes, I speak those two words waiting for "It's okay." Even as they say it, I know it is not okay. My actions caused hurt. My actions created a chain reaction. My actions caused you to want to hurt me. Time passed. "Hello"  A simple phone call changed everything. We listened to each other. A conversation of honesty. A conversation of hurt. A conversation of tears. "I'm sorry." Two simple words with a lifetime packed into them. "I accept your apology.  I did not say it's okay because it wasn't.  I forgive you." Her love poured directly into my heart ...

Be true to you. It will bring joy to you and those in your presence. However, there will be times that putting your truth into action will bring inner turmoil. Do it anyway. Grow through it. Trust yourself. Do you and have a HUMPtastic day!   🐪 🤔 💞 # humpdaytext For the past two years, I have been writing Hump Day Texts every Wednesday. They began as a way to spread some sunshine to others. A way for me to stay positive in a difficult time in my life. In the beginning, I sent them out to about ten close friends. They now go out to over 100 people with plans to make it grow even more. I know some day they will reach over ten thousand people. I am often asked if I write the texts or get them from somewhere. I write each and every one of them. Some weeks it is easier than others. When I sit down and listen to my truth, the words flow. You see, the texts have a tendency to mirror my world. Today's text was no different. It is easy to live our truth when everything is going rig...

Christmas. For many it is a joyful day filled with family and good food, for others it is a struggle to get through the day.  Yesterday was my final Christmas waking up in an empty house. I don't want to do it again. The 50 plus years of waking up super early to either sneak to the tree and open my stocking or hear my kids do the same has made the silence of Christmas morning unbearable. The last four years, I have been waking up to an empty house. I had invites this year from every member of my family. I declined them for a variety of reasons, which do not matter in this piece of writing. What matters is today I talked to people who also struggled through Christmas day.  When alone, one can get caught up in one's feelings and think they are the only one going through whatever it is. In this case, being alone on Christmas. The ache inside begins. The tears flow. It doesn't help that the Hallmark channel is playing the formulaic Christmas movies. You know the one. It ...

It is the end of the school day and here I sit in my classroom. My goal was to get caught up on grading and lesson plans. Instead, I am thinking about how to give my students the same opportunities as those in more affluent communities. More specifically, access to computers. I taught a class today where they needed to use the computer to analyze a few different types of media (an article, music video, and map). They were asked to synthesize the information and type a couple 10-12 sentence paragraphs answering two questions. There was no way the majority of them were going to finish it in class. Knowing that several do not have computers at home, I spent some time problem solving with them how to complete the assignment. I am not willing to accept it if it is handwritten. Why? Because if my students want to be able to compete in the academic world, they need to work through the challenges of accessing what they need. I will not dumb down an assignment because they do not have acces...

I fully believe the Universe gives us what we need when we don’t even know we need it. Last week, I had the privilege of attending the Ultimate Life Summit. I saw students embrace the concepts of the 7 Mindsets and begin to live them. Every day, I was more and more inspired both in education and in my life. And then the Ultimate Life Summit collided with Brave New Voices. We had the privilege to attend a couple of workshops at the BNV national convention. I went to the workshops expecting to learn how to be a better teacher. Instead, it was a life-altering personal experience. It was so powerful, I felt compelled to write for a few hours afterwards. Healing from the ugliness that remained after abuse so many years later. I share a piece of it with you. Devin We stood in the circle following the path of our eyes It was him The same young man I had seen three times in the last 24 hours Over 20 workshops, and here he was in the same room Ready to do some “Finding of the ‘in...

I have an armor of fat. It protects me from the effects of my past... or so I think. I shed it from time to time  only to put it back on, this armor of mine. Time for it to go To be taken off for good. I know it needs to go piece by piece A little at a time. Yet, knowing is not doing. It weighs me down, Hiding me from Me. The zipper is stuck. What will it take to finally get it off?  I am in need of the help of another  To get the zipper started  So I can take off the rest And be armor-free, lighter Me.

I recently wrote about how sexual abuse I experienced as a child impacted me as an adult. I was surprised at the number of people who called me brave because I spoke about it. It got me thinking about how powerful and destructive secrets can be. We keep things to ourselves because we are ashamed of them. Yet, by protecting the secret, we harm ourselves more. It is when we acknowledge our imperfections that the healing begins. The day I wrote about how the abuse affected me something in me cracked open. It was not an easy day. I spent the evening sobbing for my lost innocence. I felt the weight of my uncle on me all over again. I heard the neighbor boy telling me what to do in the closet. I saw the man who date raped me ignore me when I said I didn’t want to have sex. All very real feelings. Raw emotions came forth as I felt like I was breaking into a thousand tiny pieces. Yet, with each tear I shed came a fragment of peace and light. Once the secret was out, the power of the past ...