Voices in my head

Was it just a week ago on Sunday I got out of the shower, looked in the mirror, and threw up a little in my mouth totally disgusted by the big, blob of a stomach that was attached to me? Looking down, there was no sign of a belly button. Just a big, round mass of fat. Ewww! The self-talk continued. "Fat is gross!" "What did you do to yourself?" "You will never be able to keep weight off." "25 pounds?! You gained 25 pounds in nine months?!" "This is who you will always be - FAT!"

"SHUT UP!"

With those two words, I woke up and thought back to the words of a wise friend. "It is time to change your self talk, Mandie." I experimented with it a bit on Sunday, with Monday being the day that I became conscientious of the things I said to myself. I wrote about running up hills using the mantra, "I am loving me!" It worked! There was no stopping me now.

No diet for me. I am on the 'Love Yourself' way of life. Care to join? You can follow these 8 simple steps. (Disclaimer: They aren't as simple as they sound. Loving yourself is hard work, but so worth it!)

LOVE YOURSELF

It's a way of life!

  -->
-->

1.     Tell myself I am worthy of love.

Repeat at least 10 times throughout the day.

2.     Each morning (or anytime throughout the day), go to a mirror, look myself in the eyes* and say, “I am going to show you nothing but love today.”

*It is easier to talk about loving myself when not looking at the part of my body that disgusts me.

3.     When offered food or drink, I ask myself, “Is eating or drinking this food showing my body love?”

We had a party in school this week. One of the students brought in hot fudge sundaes. Did I mention the hot fudge was home-made?! Hot fudge sundaes are like crack to me. I was asked more than once if I wanted one. I had a bit of an argument in my head, but was able to love me and say no.

4.     Show love to my heart muscle and all of my other muscles.

My goal is to show some love to my muscles at least six days a week. I was a bit short on that this past week. The Mandie I am becoming needs to yell a bit louder to be heard.

5.     Stop the negative self-talk.

This was the most difficult step the first few days of my new way of life. I caught myself putting me down more than I care to admit. After catching myself, I rephrase it to be something positive.

6.     Cut out sugar and processed carbs.

I had to cut it out of my diet completely. The first thing I go to when emotions are in need are chips or candy. When that happens, I am retraining myself to engage in a healthy activity, such as going for a walk.

7.      Eat frequently throughout the day.

I eat six times a day. I start my day with a Body by Vi shake. (I don’t like to eat in the morning.) A snack of Greek yogurt with fruit; lunch of lentil soup or some such thing; afternoon snack of grapefruit and nuts; dinner of fish and veggies.

8.     Drink lots of water throughout the day.

I drink five to six 16oz bottles of water. Hungry? Drink more water.

It has only been a week, but it feels different from any diet I have been on in the past. I feel different. I feel good about me before the weight is lost. This week has been good in the area of weight loss (9 pounds), but even better in the area of self- love.