Spinning Mind

It has been much too long since I have written. In that time, I have given thanks for my family who was able to come down to North Carolina for the week; friends who welcomed us at their table for the holiday; and friends both near and far who continue to support me in my endeavor. I have also experienced my first snowfall in the south. Speaking of which, let’s talk about the weather for a minute – it has been freakin’ cold! I keep hearing from the old timers that this kind of weather for so long is very unusual. I do like unusual, but not in this instance! My family of three officially joined the community by attending Christmas on Main. Upon arriving, Patti found some school friends and disappeared until it was time to go home. Sean and I walked up and down the street only to be stopped every few feet by someone who knew me – in most instances, one of my students. We enjoyed the parade of tractors, motorcycles, cars, and an occasional float or two. We shopped the local hardware store for Christmas candy. (Where else would one go for it?) We enjoyed that small town feeling before heading home to warm up.

The feeling of community continues in school; although, I find myself coming home more tired than ever. I am not sure why. Maybe it is the fact that I am having difficulty keeping my exercise routine going. Or the let-down after Tony and Sana went back north. Or the change from going from a household of two to three. (Sean has moved in.) Then there is the fact that I found out my certification, and therefore retroactive pay, will not be coming until January. More likely, it is the change that happens amid the students in the short time between Thanksgiving and Christmas break. Whether you are a child or adult, the most joyous of holidays can be stressful. I am one of a handful (and by handful I mean a few) of adults the students come to with issues. In the last week and a half, it has been one right after another. It began with one of my ‘sons’ (as the teachers commonly refer to him) showing me a video he made for his aunt’s funeral. She was younger than I am. The next day, a girl confided in me that she cuts and hopes to get into counseling. (Her mother is working on making it happen.) The mother of one of the 8^th graders died of cancer over the past weekend. One of my new students mentioned to me that his brother died in the war last year. (Did I mention Sean is actively persuing the army?) Today, a boy told me that he can’t focus on his work because his is depressed and thinking thoughts about harming himself.

Behavior in class is more ADHD than ever. Of course, half the population in two of my classes are diagnosed with ADHD so the holiday season just makes it all the more interesting. Substitutes struggle with students. Many of them come in and work in my room to either keep out of trouble or because the sub has sent them. My friend and colleague is the basketball coach. A blast watching him coach, but I am missing our debriefing sessions each day. I am with students every day from 7:30am – 5:00pm: morning tutoring, classes, my adopted class, and the Homework Party. Home to make supper, clean, correct papers (or not), and spend time with Patti and Sean.

On a bright note, remember the boy of a few weeks ago who was contemplating joining a gang? His behavior continued to change for the worse. His mother called me at home on several occasions at a loss for what to do. He was not doing his work in any of his classes (with the exception of his Goodwill Cards). Avoiding talking to me. Fooling around in class. I was so worried about him, I talked to the principal about him on Friday. His mother called me on Sunday. As a result, I set up a meeting with all of us – the student, mother, teachers, guidance counselor, and principal. I am happy to say, it made a difference! In the meeting, his lack of doing work was addressed, but we focused on the larger issue of friends. Are they the people encouraging poor behavior such as jumping another student and joining a gang? Or are they the ones persuading good behavior the completion of school work? From there we gave him strategies of how to get out of situations where he might make a poor choice. A plan was made. He gave his word that he would do his work in each of his classes today. HE DID!! He smiled! I am so proud of him and what he accomplished today! It will be a daily struggle for a while, but I know he can make it with support.

This weekend, I will be focusing on what is positive about each and every one of my students, as well as many who are not my students, as I write them Goodwill Cards. The students struggle with saying something positive while the negative flows out like lava. Mr. Wilson and myself have made it a goal this year to change their way of thinking. It has begun.